This comment I found rather interesting as it describes what it takes to make a relationship work plus demonstrates how feminism's endless intrusion via government and laws, just guarantees that it won't. Take out the main factors from a relationship or marriage, something or somebody has to pay and it's generally the relationship itself..
The endless hand-wringing that we read in the "Dear Joyce" columns use to be about finding a mate, but now it more about everything else. Primarily the search for the "Soul Mate" has been thrown into the bin as a waste of time while reality drags the dreamers back into reality. Some eventually realise that a relationship/partnership is not always about them and certain compromises are demanded whether you like it or not.
If you don't then it just a matter of going your own way and either adhering to that or repositioning yourself back onto the "dating" market in pursuit of the next mistake..
The main issue being that women have changed, they changed to suit themselves without any consideration on their part about what men want or would like in a female. They in turn have responded with "Here I am, take me as I am, take it or leave it" and now they are finding a response they never expected. That response being "No Thanks". This is what all that complaining is about..
Sometimes the obvious lessons are the hardest to learn, while blame can be redirected very easily. Many a time have I spoken to ex partners who live in the regret that they screwed up a good working relationship because they felt it was not a working proposition or could have been better or it just was not what they expected. Rather than take the hard road by fixing it, they take the easy road and end it as that can always justify it in their own minds..
Taking anything for granted is not a lesson learnt until it's gone and after that eventuation, it becomes an all consuming problem, that just won't let go. Continual self scrutiny and continual reminders mixed with thoughts of regret stay with you for a long time. Many have been there and many more will end up there as well..
The song "You don't what you've got until it's gone" is a lot more meaningful and ironic when it applies to some past relationship that went the way of the dodo and did so without any effort on your part. It can turn into an unrelenting cycle as it's pursuit appears to be more important than the end result..
So here is a response to the view of replacing the "patriarchy" with the "Matriarchy" and then living in denial about replacing one level of control with another. A bit like "Welcome the new boss who is just like the old boss"..
Why Not Matriarchy?
Women can raise families communally without men, but it’s a bad idea.
By Lea Halim
This response it the above article..
 tyhmaplanet | |
Good grief! I suppose I've just grown old and apart from what's goofed up in this world. I don't understand it and I'm not sure I want to understand it. Having a good marriage has everything to do with love and sacrifice, and I feel it necessary to add, between a man and a woman. Here's a little story that tells a tale. There once was a little four-year-old boy, whose mother dumped him on her parents after deciding her second marriage wasn't satisfactory and who decided to return to her first husband. He took her back for a little while, but not in marriage, just in sex. She'd had two children by him, but they, like the four she'd had by her second husband, ended up with her parents. She wandered about promiscuously until she happened upon her third husband, by whom she had another two children, who were also principally raised by other people. She married a fourth time at age sixty, but, for obvious reasons, had no children. This last marriage was annulled after six months. The mother barely participated in raising any of her eight children. Now, this four-year-old became a five-year-old and was taken in by a saintly aunt, sister to his, by now, drunken, bumpkin father. She and her hard-working husband raised him until he was ten, teaching him good principles for living, training him in good behaviors, and instilling an understanding that such a thing as faith and a being called God existed. At ten years of age, he wanted to go live with his drunken, bumpkin father, which didn't work out, so he ended up in a few other relative's homes until he was fourteen, at which time he and his sister went to live with their still drunken, bumpkin father. Now, this was not a good time period in either of their lives. Many untoward experiences occurred, all of it laced with alcohol and other vices. Still, he'd had his saintly aunt's and her husband's influence, which wasn't easily doused, even in a debauched environment. One day, he met a young girl, or, rather, she caught sight of him. She was twelve and he was fifteen. He had no interest in her, but she said many times througout her life that she never had an interest in any other man. A few years later, they were married. Being inspired by his love for a good woman, the boy became a man, changed his ways and they raised eight children together, and were the forbears of 35 grandchildren, more than 70 great-grandchildren and more than 20 great-great-grandchildren by the time he passed away after 71 years of happy, struggling, difficult, wonderful, joyful marriage. They had four sons, who are all on their first marriage, the first having been married forty-six years, the second thirty-nine, the third thirty-six, and the fourth thirty-seven years. Their four daughters were not all as successful, yet, the oldest has been married to her only husband for forty-nine years, the second had two failed marriages, which were a result of poor choices fueled by rebelliousness, the third had one divorce that was later rectified when the two remarried, and the last has been married to her only husband twenty-eight years. Much of the early part of this story took place during the period leading up to and into the Prohibition Era, which gave birth to a lot of "freedom" and "promiscuity" for women, as well as men, which all perhaps led to the Great Depression, and which may have played a part in these events and outcomes. It's also of interest to note that many of the grandchildren are experiencing some of the negative outcomes seen in the lives of the drunken, bumpkin father and his promiscuous ex-wife. This, all in a period not unlike the teens and twenties of the last century - unparalleled prosperity and leisure, woman screaming for more freedom and getting it, but this time with help of federal laws that tend to relegate males to the status of unimportant sidekicks, and much of a couple of generations expecting to do nothing while someone else does it for them. This generation, like their forbears, were raised by good parents, who taught them well. So why the trouble? Since World War II, as in the early part of the twentieth century, women and men have been increasingly freed from hard, physical work. They have many hours of leisure to enjoy the benefits of a prosperity that is, at least in part, technologically enabled. There is a declining faith in him whose blessing it is. Gratitude is an increasingly scarce attribute, often supplanted by arrogance and self-centeredness. This is a seemingly inescapable result of extended prosperity. Does a woman want a good man with whom to marry and have a family? I believe most do. Then, treat men like men and demand manhood. Stop trying to replace them with you. Stop trying to fill a man's role and try being a woman. It may work. It just may, but it must be a societal change and government must stop being a partner in demeaning manhood and womanhood. Yes, there are good men out there, but, I'm afraid, they're growing scarce. Feminism with the cooperation of government and socialists are doing their best to wipe them out. We need traditional roles. If you want a successful 71 years together, take my word for it, you won't get it by competing with your spouse, or with the opposite gender. You get it by lovingly cooperating and working together, sacrificing for one another and the family you create, filling roles for which each of you is divinely endowed with unique and wonderful traits. It just gets more confusing does it not. The thing is that none of it is new. The is nothing new under the sun as the saying goes. It's all been tried before and it always changes back to what works the best. What was working best is what feminists have spent the last forty years trying to destroy. So it's just another cycle and another wasted effort tryig to force the population to change and a few elitists as usual are responsible for all the chaos. Welcome to the new/old world.. | |
