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| From This.. |
That task is ofcourse impossible, the best example is the sex issue. To the opposite sex, sex is an emotive and all encompassing act that reconfirms her need for love and attention. Sex is a conformation of that requirement, as women generally find it difficult to just have a shag just for the sake of it. Not all, but the majority. They have been using sexual intimacy to shore up their emotional attachment to an individual. Sex was the response to love, whatever the female determined it to be..
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| To this.. |
American Sex Roles Unnerving to Eastern European Women
In looking into the phenomenon of culture shock, I recently came across a 2004 study that examines the problems Eastern European women have while adjusting to life in American society. The study is valuable in that it gives us a perspective rarely found in the English language, and suggests that American women themselves may be damaged (possibly more than men) through an enforced sexless environment.
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And it gets better..
It opens with a provocative question:
How do immigrant women from patriarchal cultures adjust to life in the Great Plains, where gender equality and feminism prevail? Do they feel that they have freedom from sexism and more social opportunities, or do they long for the female role that they left behind in their home culture? There are few places in the world where the women’s movement has been as vocal and active as in American culture. Gender equality is highly valued, and Americans believe that they have made more advances in this area than most cultures around the world (E. Kim 2001). As a result, many Americans assume that immigrant women will embrace gender equality and prefer to be women “in the American way.” Because American feminists perceive traditional women as oppressed, they seek to educate them about feminism and try to help them shed the traditional female role they were socialized to fulfill. How do immigrant women respond to American attitudes toward gender? How do they change as a result of living in a gender-neutral envi- ronment? Do encounters with American feminists help or hinder their cultural adaptation?
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Apparently, despite the patriarchal nature of Eastern European society, women are treated with a great deal of respect, and deferred to in many situations. Men may be overrepresented in the public world, and women not taken as seriously there, but in private women are given a great deal of consideration and treated like ladies:
Writings on Eastern Europe stress the patriarchal nature of society, in which gender roles are distinct but complementary, with apparent respect for the role of women (Richmond 1995). Gender relations in Eastern Europe exist on two very different levels. On the one hand, the world of public institutions is patriarchal and male dominated. Even though men and women participate in the workforce in equal numbers, men receive higher salaries and hold most positions of power. On the other hand, interpersonal relations between men and women are either egalitarian or women receive preferen- tial treatment in them. Politeness toward women is highly valued. Men are attentive to the needs of women and seek to protect them from harm. Men are attentive to the needs of women and seek to protect them from harm. Gestures of respect such as opening the door for a woman or giving up one’s seat on the bus for a woman reflect a positive attitude toward women’s feminine qualities within the interpersonal realm. “Eastern Europe is still very much a man’s world. Women are flattered to excess, have their hands kissed, are presented with flowers, and are given other deferential treatment, but traditional attitudes toward the female sex still prevail. Women attempting to work professionally must prove themselves before they are accepted as equals”
I find it amusing that the need to “prove themselves” in the professional world is seen as a burden; the same is expected of Western men. However, the attention, affection and deference must be a source of comfort to many Eastern European women in their home countries.
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In addition to the different attitudes concerning equality, the concept of feminism is not the same in Eastern Europe as it is in the West:
Most East Europeans associate feminism with gender equality in the legal sense. They feel that feminism cannot have much impact on their lives because during the past 50 years socialist ideology already promoted gender equality, women worked alongside with men, and equal opportunity clauses guaranteed their rights, in some countries earlier than in the West (Rohrlich 1979), yet discrimination in the workplace still prevailed.[...]Most feminist research in the United States is based on the assumption that treating men and women differently has a detrimental effect on both individuals and on society (Wood 2002). Efforts are being made to decrease the presence of gender in professional interactions and to avoid sexism, the discriminatory treatment of women. As a result of feminism, changes took place in notions about what is considered feminine and masculine, and in what is appropriate work for men and for women. Women strive to become more assertive and to enter formally male-dominated areas of life (Hofstede 1998). Gender-neutral use of language is expected in public and professional interaction (Lakoff 1975; Murphy and Zorn 1996)…
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| And This. What strides they have Made.. |
Women love compliments and just thrive when that is given without qualification, as the compliments come easily and are greatly appreciated..
I can remember talking to a female who was besides herself because she was whistled at and took great comfort from the fact that she had enough sex appeal for it to be noticed. That was never an issue before feminists decided it was. In most cases in the past, you whistled at a female and you received a smile, a smile that said either "I am sexy aren't I" or "thank goodness someone appreciates the way I look, do know what it takes", it made the effort all more worth the while. Well maybe not that overboard but it was appreciated for the reason it was given.
Now they arc up at any gesture that may be interpreted as being even remotely complementary. The poor buggers go through work the whole day, after spending copious hours trying to look good and never been told they do, must be disheartening to any woman. Unless ofcourse your a screaming harpy just graduating from one of those "Women's/Gender Studies" indoctrination centres where you learn to hate anything male, period. No compliment would ever be tolerated or missed to ensure some reporting to the HR department was warranted, even false accusations can be justified. See the problem..
The irony here is that American women actually expect chivalry, politeness and the rest (as thousands of wistful articles, comments and blog posts attest), but they do not invite it, and in public they excoriate men for acting in this manner. Nor are they capable of behaving in a feminine manner; even if they were naturally inclined to do so, the tendency was eradicated when they were young.
Further along in the study, Eastern European women report being demoralized by the “sterilized” relationship between men and women, particularly in the workplace, where they lose interest in interacting with American men. One reason for this is that when they behave according to their cultural norms, America men tend to avoid them, probably fearing job loss through a sexual harassment claim. One woman, originally from Belarus, said that at work men “are afraid to look at a person who is female.” The EE women also report that although it appears that equalizing gender roles has worked surprisingly well in the US, they do not like it in their own lives.
They see American men as henpecked, inattentive to women (in terms of traditional manners), and less traditionally masculine, and American women as mannish, bossy and dominant. Some of their negative associations are left over from Communist times, when women in positions of authority were brutal and expected to behave like men. Over time, a negative stereotype about these kinds of women led EE women to prefer a more feminine role.
So it is for good reason that one of the posts on this blog titled "Top Ten reasons why American women suck" has had the most hits as well as commentary..
Apr 23, 2007, 174 comments | 14,134 Pageview |
Does this surprise me, not at all as the reputation of the American female has deteriorated over the last 40 years to being the person to avoid. Apart from being rude and obnoxious, they appear to be incapable of being female. Not all, but way too many to be able to generalise quite comfortably without any fear of contradiction..
