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| Don't even think about defending yourself as you will go to jail without question. Women can abuse at will. |
One wonders if anything else dares to break through that heightened wall of victimhood. But alas, we have a slight clearance in the fog as a request is forwarded for some input into issues apart from their own mountain of doom..
One does have to be carful whenever asking this question as the response may not be what one expects. Once the floodgates are opened there will be no closing them again.
My response to this question would simply be to direct the request here (the online compendium of Men's Issues) . All or most of the issues are covered, it is still in the process of being updated as TDOM has stated. But it does give the gist of what is ailing society today and where the sexism, discrimination and bias really is..
So we have this request..
AW - Greetings and salutations, forum members!Maybe a few of the followers or readers may like to express their opinion and respond to the question and I will update as we go along. Meanwhile, here are a few responses on that forum where the question was originally posed..
A few disclaimers:1. I'm an American woman, but I'm not here to promote myself. I'm telling you to put my post in context.2. I don't want to pull focus from the issues. If you find my post disruptive, I'll take a hint from the silence and leave.3. This forum is primarily for men to exchange ideas, rant, and support one another. I've posted under "Opposing Views" out of respect for that mission, not to challenge it.4. These disclaimers aren't to paint myself as a good American woman; I just worry about not saying exactly what I mean. My apologies if it sounds tedious or self-promoting.
I'm not so much posting from an opposing view but a limited view. I appreciate men's plight, but I as a woman can never fully understand it. And since words don't do much, I want to actively address whatever sexism I see -- walk the walk, I suppose. Of course, there are probably thousands of little sexisms I don't pick up on. I can pay my half at meals, write letters advocating against false rape charges, etc -- but there's probably so many things I won't catch from my perspective.
So here's my question: aside from major issues like paternity fraud and women using sex as leverage, what small acts of misandry to you see regularly? And how can well-meaning women avoid them -- as girlfriends, sisters, coworkers, wives, etc? We can't make things equal, but we can still do our best to be fair.
You now have the floor. I greatly appreciate any and all contributions (and will understand if I receive none).
Opening Pandora's Box..
Man 1 - Seen any MacDonald's ads recently?
AW - I haven't seen any McDonald's ads recently. Is one you're referring to available online?
Man 2 -How about all the Progressive ads on TV with cute, lovable Flo and the men who come in her insurance store? They're always fat, balding, and wearing glasses except for one male character I saw. And they're always shown as either sexist, stupid, crazy or amazingly immature, while the female customers are always attractive and witty and mature. Think how feminists would react if it were the reverse.
Or how about the sit-coms on TV today which almost all follow the "Simpson's" formula, with the husband as totally incompetent and bumbling, cowardly, selfish and immature but their wives are intelligent and hard working, unselfish, etc.
Or the beer commercials, I forget the beer, where men go into a bar and are friendly with the pretty bar maid but she ridicules them mercilessly just because their pants aren't in style or they say the wrong thing. And they probably drink the wrong beer too.
And on and on. This is common is today's media. What effect does this have on young boys growing up today? How about news reports about a story where 20 male miners died in a tragic mine disaster? The reporters will never say it was 20 MEN who died. They'll say that 20 WORKERS died or that there were 20 VICTIMS of the disaster. But if there was one woman who got killed, all the reports would be "19 men and one woman killed". There's a great video about this on manwomanmyth.com, among many others that go into other topics, like how so many of the laws today are anti-male and pro-female, and how schools are biased against boys and toward girls.
Man 3 -This is a perfectly valid question, and I will answer it honestly and completely:
The most common ones I see on a regular basis:
1. The appropriation of men as "useful objects" to women who are either lazy or have no interest in performing certain duties if they can simply require men to do these things for them. The examples of this are countless, but are not limited to "borrowing" money from men (which, in my experience, is almost never paid back), commanding men to carry heavy shit, making jokes about responsbilities that they simply pass off to men (IE telling their girlfriends "that's what men are for"), asking men to fill their shifts at work for no intrinsic benefit/reward, and asking men to fix things that they broke instead of using google to figure it out themselves.
2. Creating false dichotomies involving polar opposites of men where neither extreme is viewed favorable - like the niceguy/badboy. Women tend to denigrate both of these parties even though they are loosely defined and highly pidgeonholed, despite the tendency for American women to be attracted toward the latter group. In other words, men are always viewed as guilty/flawed even when he fits the bill perfectly. This is some combination of paranoia/entitlement among women, but it is clearly evident because women try to take advantage of even those men who they perceive to be the most attractive.
3. Using legal/social leverage to manipulate men through false allegations (if you don't do XYZ for me then I'll report you for crime/offense ABC). While this is rarer than the above two embodiments of misandry, it is perhaps the most foul. Since men are presumed to be guilty when their accuser is a woman (who often employs other friends or fake witnesses to persecute the man) it can be extremely difficult for a man to beat. Your post implies that you are somewhat familiar with this already, so I'll leave it there.
4. Intentional emotional abuse of men for personal sense of power. Taunting, nagging, manipulation, teasing/controlling men with sex, suggesting competition from other men and implying superiority are all part of this. Most men in relationships can reiterate this better than I can.
I personally do not see an easy solution to these dynamics because many of them are enforced legally (IE promoting women to divorce a rich man because its a faster way to wealth than working through the corporate ladder) and can therefore profit from the objectification and disposal of men. If individual men and women decide to genuinely reject this sort of behavior, that is perhaps the best response without systemic changes. And it is precisely the focus of this particular forum.
